A nun walks into a bar…

I’m a liar; a nun certainly did NOT walk into a bar. A very lovely, but dead, nun has become the first Australian Saint (we will now call her “Our Saint Mary”).

So JJ is currently away, eating his weight in fish tacos and cheese enchiladas in San Diego, and fitting in some work, of course.

Anyway, after a feed at my mum’s, I was pulling out of her driveway and she walked to the car quickly.

I try not to look in her direction but she ra-ta-taps urgently on the window and I can’t pretend not to notice. I wind down my window.

Mum: I don’t like you sleeping at home alone while JJ’s away. Why don’t you stay here?
Me: (Hahahahaha) I’m ok. Watch your feet. 

I inch out but, clearly, she’s not done.

Mum: Don’t be fooled by anyone knocking at the door. Don’t let them in.
Me (I’ve seen the bait, I can’t avoid it. I take it): Who’s going to knock at my door trying to get in, mum?
Mum: You know, some people pretend to be nuns. They dress as nuns and then they knock on peoples’ door wanting to get in to rob you and do whatever else. They pretend to be nuns.
Me (hook, line, and sinker): People pretend to be nuns to get in your house. Mum, when was the last time you heard of anyone who was robbed by someone pretending to be a nun to trick their way into their house? That’s ridiculous.
Mum: It happens.
Me: To who?
Mum: I hear these things.
Me: From Italian satellite TV?
Mum: You’ll thank me for warning you when a nun comes knocking at your door wanting to use the phone.
Me: Watch your feet!

Clockwise from top left: Fake nuns, fake (but very realistic) nun, real nun, fake nun